Christopher...

Truth-
She is amazing, all of her. I do love her. Why though, why must I be so screwed over in the head? Why can't I tell anyone that I love her? Why did I scream at her? I never scream at any one that I love. Why did it have to be her I broke to? Why couldn't it of been someone I don't need as much? Why did I have to be so immature? I've lost her forever.
I'm truly dead to her. When she looks at me she sees nothing. Not even a single speck of hate flickers in the back of her mind. It's so horrible. I never though such true agony could exist.
I never would of imagined, even if I had though such a feeling could be real, that I would experience it.

It's so horrible. The way I fall into their thoughts. I am useless, and deserve to burn in hell only because of the people I love. Because of the label that I have. Isn't that horrid, that I finally really believe that? How!?!? Why have I come to believe them with such a passion!? I would never believe that he should deserve such a thing, and yet I have come to believe that I do deserve it. It is unbearable. The thoughts I have that I am so evil, only because of who I am. Only because of what I can't control. Only because of who I love.



I will never tell one living soul.

I will love alone forever.

Only because I am a living fault.